After your relationship breaks up, both you and your ex girlfriend likely have regrets and are hurt from the resoluteness of the break up. You may wish to give the relationship another chance and get your ex girlfriend back, and chances are that she probably feels the same way inside! But your ex may resist or even avoid you for now; after a break up both sides need time and space to let heated feelings (and resistance) cool down – girls usually longer so than guys.
There are a number of “sneaky” tactics you can use right away after a break up (even three seconds right after your ex girl calls it quits) — that will make her realize:
- You are irreplaceable and dear to her life; she may never find someone else that fulfills her like you do.
- She may have just lost you for good.
- Breaking up with you was probably rash and a stupid mistake and she should have tried to work things out with you before it was too late.
You see, you’re going to turn things around completely – instead of your ex being the one rejecting your texts, calls, or attempts at reconciliation, you two will switch roles and your ex girlfriend will be the one running back to you!
Step #1: Agree with the break up and appear relieved
You might be stunned, very confused, or badly hurt by your girlfriend’s decision to break up. It’s healing to let your feelings out and be honest with yourself about how you feel, but in your ex girl’s presence, hide your pain and sadness temporarily – they’ll drive her away at this moment! The first step you need to take as soon as possible is to agree that the break up is a good thing; acknowledge that you think breaking up is a wise decision and say you think “we’d be better off that way.”
Breathe, be cordial and brief, speak calmly and clearly, and show that you are relieved to be out of this relationship. Let your self-confidence shine through – that says you’ll be fine (and possibly better off) without her, bid her well sincerely and say goodbye. You can probably see by now – this turns the power of reuniting over into your hands, which means your ex girlfriend is now the rejected one.
If you cannot meet face to face (which I recommend,) I’ve heard that this works well in writing, too. Keep your note short! And remember, you’re “moving on,” so space between you and your ex girl is needed for a while.
Step #2: Don’t try to make her jealous
This means don’t purposely hit on her close friends or hotties who happen to be in the same room with you and her. Your ex will feel that you’re not over her, you’re uncouth, and you want her to feel envious – which is a BIG turn-off for your ex (and prospective dates) and distasteful, to boot.
Instead, acknowledge to yourself that you are a very desirable man who leads a full, generous life; take initiative to make yourself happy, active, and fulfilled or you may bring others down with you and give off a “depressing aura” (it is a big challenge; after a devastating break up you probably just want to stay in bed, munch on comfort foods, and do other things–but they’ll make you sadder and hinder you from prepping up to enrapture your ex.)
If, however, your ex naturally happens to hear or see that you’ve been dating out, great! It’ll have a much bigger impact on her than if she hears this news from you. What also works really well on your ex is hearing from a friend that you’ve been doing just great and have been busy and out having fun. So don’t hold back on going out; you’re a precious, worthy-of-love, and one-of-a-kind person, and now that your ex has let you go, you’re free to be “back on the market,” so to speak!
Step #3: Stuck on your ex girlfriend? Here’s how to make her stuck on you instead!
To quote “the most romantic man in the world” (who’s been featured on many TV stations and shows,) Michael Webb–“A man who has a heart will win over far more women than a man who has a Harley.”
Speaking as a girl, many, many women will say, “True that!!” You can volunteer as a Big Brother (someone who volunteers with boys without dads,) go out and give your strength and able body to community service work, help out your friends, etc. You gotta do it honestly, though – not as an act; your ex girlfriend will perceive all this and, if she can tell you’re true about it, you’ll gain more than her admiration–she’ll really do a 180 in her head and wonder what was she thinking when she wanted to break up with a man who exudes such kindness and warmth (this is really attractive to all ladies, so if your girl wants to come back, she’ll likely have competition!)
What you do will weigh much heavier than what you say to her.
Step #4: Exude self-confidence and stay socially-active
If getting your ex girlfriend back is your primary focus, surround yourself with well-wishers, positive attitudes and good friends. Show your girl that people appreciate you, and that they love having you around. As more people begin to feel good about your presence in their lives, your ex will begin to see you in a completely new light. She will realize that you are a good person that she simply cannot afford to possibly lose. You are above being easily abandoned. This is one of the best ways to let your ex notice you in a new light.
Maintain a good appearance and take care of your health! This may be a challenge after a break up when you feel like not eating or sleeping but withdrawing into the house. In order to get your ex back you should not let your appearance reflect your situation. You need to pay attention to every detail of your looks, including your clothes, your hair, your stride, your shoes and even your voice.
It can be hard to act happy or to take care of yourself following a bad breakup, but this is one of the best ways that you can let your ex know that you are doing just fine and are responsible for your own happiness. This is likely the way you were when she spoke to you in her special way, smiled often at you, and desired to always be by your side.
While these will definitely help you with getting your ex girl back…