There is a place for honesty. If you find yourself in a situation to get back an ex because of misplaced honesty this experience will help you out. To get back an ex is not an easy task it is a building process. It will not happen overnight with a magic wand.
Let me tell you a story of a person which I will leave in anonymity. This may have happened to you or there are aspects of this story that you can relate to before you found yourself trying to get back an ex. It seems that when you are single you hardly hear anything from an ex or there is hardly anyone that you notice paying attention to you. As soon as you get serious with a person you become this kind of magnet to others even to your ex. Suddenly there is a new light about you. Everywhere you go they notice you, everyone waves at you, and everyone talks to you. So here is the story. In the spirit of anonymity we will simply call him the guy.
The guy is living the college life, books, party and a beautiful girlfriend. The guy had a nice relationship or so he thought when along came his ex from high school. She had the desire to catch up with him. The guy did not see the harm in it. So they talked on the phone a few times about nothing in particular just things of the past and what he was up to lately. Of course, as the conversation develops he told her that he has a girlfriend. She, curious asked him about how she was and he described her mentioning all the attributes of his attraction for her. At this point there is no harm; just innocent conversation over the phone. Well, the time came and she asked him about how he felt about going out to the movies. The guy said sure why not. So long story short. They saw the movie then stayed chatting away in the car. Conversation about attributes strikes out and before you know it she is kissing him. The guy’s reaction was to push her away. He told her that he has a girlfriend and that he likes her very much. So the evening ended up a bit sour.
Next in the story he decides to tell his girlfriend about the incident. She, of course, reacted badly and decided to break up with him. He is desperate now and begs her to stay. But she wouldn’t take him back. Now he finds himself in a situation to get back an ex. So what happened here? Now he has become the ex. How to get back an ex after this event? Before I get to that allow me to make a parenthesis here so those of you who are paying attention can avoid making this mistake in the future. There is a place for honesty in a relationship. When? When it serves a higher purpose to preserve and enhance the relationship or to better the one you love. On this particular case if he didn’t expected a kiss and he pushed the girl away when it happened and explained that he likes his girlfriend that is it, end of story. What would be the objective or motivation to tell your girlfriend about it? What do you want? A cookie. It is not our intention to sound harsh just to make a point. “Better a lie that heals than a truth that wound” There is a place for honesty. Now the mission is “get back an ex”.
So, let’s get back on the topic. First and foremost, you need to give her space and it is your turn to be patient. She is hurt and probably feeling betray regardless of the fact that you honestly didn’t mean to. Do not call her every five minutes. Avoid sending flowers or making a cd with your favorite songs. Why? Because all these actions will suffocate her and she needs to get her thoughts in line. She will replay in her head the things you said. Then when enough time has passed make contact in a very casual way. This means that you are not calling her to take you back. You are calling because you are concern for her well being. There will be a time for you to touch that topic when the time is right.
I have more to help you through to get back an ex but we will continue on another article.
